Summer Camp

Let’s discuss the closing day of camp. You might think it’s a simple matter of arriving to pick up your child and a return to normal life. While it does mean reuniting after being separated for these past few weeks, it’s also an emotional time for most girls, and there are a few things parents can do to help their children as they leave camp.

Pickup Time

We don’t assign arrival times for pickup like we do for the opening day drop off, and instead ask you to arrive on closing day between 9am and 11:30am. My first tip is this; try not to be either the first or the last parent to pick up your camper. It’s not always possible to avoid these extremes for pratical travel purposes, like needing to catch a flight for example, but aiming for mid-morning is best.

Being picked up first means being the first to say goodbye to everyone at camp. It feels the most abrupt having to drive away (or leave on the earliest airport shuttle) while everyone else gets to savor more time with each other. Leaving first is tough because it feels like your camp time is ending at the same time as you’re saying goodbye to ALL of your friends. It’s an intense jolt in two ways.

Being one of the last to be picked up from camp is difficult too. It’s exhausting to say goodbye over and over as each friend is called to leave while you stay behind. It’s a little sad too, as campers can’t help but think their parents have forgotten something. If you are delayed for some reason (e.g., traffic, etc.), please call the office so we can let your camper know you’re running late.

A Sense of Loss

It’s important to know there is a real sense of loss that comes with leaving camp. Earlier this summer I wrote about Rockbrook being a haven, about it providing relief from certain pressures and challenges girls commonly experience the rest of their lives. In ten significant ways, we saw how certain aspects of “regular life” are particularly difficult for kids. In a world that’s defined these days by constant competition and judgment (think of school), that’s reved up to a breakneck pace, lived mostly indoors and saturated with information, that’s laden with social pressures, assumed inferiority and often prejudice, and that defaults regularly to electronic media for entertainment, it’s tough being a kid. Throughout the year, there’s a lot to shoulder.

When camp provides a refuge from all of this, when girls join a community that’s free from these challenging forces, they experience the most incredible feeling of joyful freedom. That’s when they find themselves playing more, exploring and trying new things. That’s when they’re suddenly more independent, more confident, curious and resilient. That’s when they feel recharged, and begin to develop habits of kindness, of paying attention to others, and of enthusiasm for new experiences. Most importantly, the haven of the camp community provides the perfect safe environment to open up and be their true selves. And it’s this authenticity of self that enlivens the forces of friendship. Kids make their very best friends at camp as a result.

So this is what your girls feel they are losing when their camp session ends. They’re losing life in a haven where they feel so good, have so much fun, and are surrounded by such great friends, and they’re returning to a world where things are more difficult. The relief they experience at camp is coming to an end, at least for now. No wonder they are bound to be feeling sad! No wonder they are often crying.

How to Help

What can you as parents do to help your girls when they are leaving camp? First, take what we know they are going through and simply be understanding. This post helps you with that hopefully. Ask her about her friends and about what she liked about camp. Show her that you are interested in her experience at camp by listening to her. You can reassure her that she’ll be able to stay in touch with her camp friends (we’ll provide a list of everyone’s contact info), and if it feels right, that she can look forward to returning to Rockbrook next year.

Secondly, and this is really important, do what you can to ease your girls’ reentry into their lives at home and school. Remember, there’s a huge difference here. For example, go slow firing up a busy schedule of “things we’ve gotta do.” Try your best to turn down the heat of any pressure she might be feeling with respect to school. Remind her of good friends she’ll see back at home. I also would suggest not jumping right back online, into her phone. Maybe make a deal that you’ll leave your phones off in the car for the ride home, creating a good chunk of time for talking about her camp experience. Think of it this way; everything about her smartphone is antithetical to the life she lived at camp, so you can help soften her return to ordinary life by reducing the role it plays for her. Yes, older girls may feel they have “missed their phone,” but they also now know how great they feel without it. She may not see it this way, but you’ll be doing her a real disservice by handing over her phone as soon as she gets in the car. There’s nothing worse for extinguishing the camp glow she’s been feeling while here.

Leaving camp is tough, tougher for some than others, but it’s something we all have to do. And yes, it’s sad. Our challenge becomes discovering ways we can feel glimpses of camp magic in the currents of ordinary life. I believe it can be done, especially with good friends by your side. My hope is that your Rockbrook girls will feel empowered and find the courage to do exactly that.

We’ll see you on closing day. Oh, and you might want to plan a visit to Dolly’s before you leave town. She’ll love that.

Over the winter, I learned about a concept called the “third place.” This is a social setting in our lives separate from our “first” and “second” places – home and work/school, respectively. They are anchors of community life where we exchange ideas, relax and have fun, and most importantly, build and maintain relationships. A “third place” place is where people from diverse backgrounds are welcomed, people know your name, and shared experiences are had. Examples of third places in modern life include libraries, parks, theaters, bowling alleys, and bookstores. Your community’s living room, if you will.

Upon learning about third places, Rockbrook immediately came to mind. Community is a word I hear time and time again when describing Rockbrook, and for me it’s the word that I think of first when I bring to mind this magical oasis in the heart of the wooded mountains. It is where I learned how vital being a part of a community is. Rockbrook has become a catalyst for me seeking other communities outside of camp, communities where lasting friendships- like at Rockbrook -are sure to be made. We are, after all, social creatures who need community.

For many, camp may be the only place where we experience what it’s like to live in and be a member of a community. In a society that is chronically online and addicted to screens, social media has become our third place. Yet social media provides a false sense of a social life, ultimately leaving us more isolated than connected. Not to mention, we then are too tired to meet IRL because not only are our schedules busier, but we are fatigued from interacting with people via group texts, comments, and DMs. Online, we simply don’t get the same exhilaration that comes from true connection. Sadly, this applies to children too. And for many of our campers, camp may be the only physical third space they inhabit.

Camp, unlike other third places, provides a complete and total separation from social media and screens. It allows children to be immersed in a more intentional version of a third place— a home away from home where they feel carefree, included, and connected. At camp there is a feeling of belonging and identity as we are a collective who share common values and culture. Trust, solidarity, and empathy are built from our constant interaction with one another— vital social skills we can’t develop through social media. Campers feel rooted to Rockbrook, rejuvenated by spending time here.

Within the world of camp itself- where cabins serve as the home and activities serve as a second place of sorts -there are endless amounts of third places scattered throughout. These third places allow campers and staff alike to gather with others who they may not interact with in their cabin or activity settings. It provides opportunities for connection with campers from other age groups, counselors they don’t know yet, and the other adults that help keep camp running. There’s the dining hall, where a junior cabin may give a shout out and pass along a song to a senior cabin. A lodge, a great meeting spot for a club like Rockbrook Readers or to play a board game. The lake, which sees campers and counselors alike during a Free Swim. The creek by Curosty, a place where those of any age or role congregate who love to witness all the natural wonders that Rockbrook has to offer. The Hill, camp’s most central location, always buzzing with activity, and the main place we all assemble for, well, Assembly on the Hill. Even the paths that meander around camp serve as a third place, where small but meaningful moments of connection occur via a wave or a smile or a name called out in greeting.

In The Great Good Place, Ray Oldenburg explains that “third places thrive best in locales where community life is casual […] Attachment to the area and the sense of place that it imparts expands with the individuals’ walking familiarity with it […] These [places] are not only safe, they invite human connection.” What community life is more casual than that of camp life? Where children are encouraged to rest for at least one hour each day, can wear whatever they wish, and have the freedom to choose what they want to do with their time. Oldenburg characterizes third places as having a playful nature, and at camp unstructured real-world play and silly fun is highly valued. Rockbrook’s rustic, cozy feel where kids of all backgrounds are embraced align with another quality of Oldenburg’s third places. The casual nature of camp makes connecting with anyone easy.

Regular contact is one of the greatest requirements in any relationship. Third places flourish through the connection of the regulars who inhabit them because they set the tone of the community. Because third places offer availability with zero effort, they are key in helping to foster reliable, supportive, and lasting friendships. If you know Rockbrook, you know how much friendship is valued here. It’s in our songs, a tenant of our mission, and a subject of countless heartfelt Spirit Fire speeches. If the word “community” somehow doesn’t come to mind when you think of Rockbrook, then most definitely “friendship” does. A strong community breeds strong friendships, and community really thrives in these essential third places like Rockbrook – where we’re free to be ourselves, face to face.

It’s one of the most beautiful moments of camp. The setting is certainly beautiful with a bright, glowing campfire in the center and towering trees protecting us all around, with the sounds of crickets and peeping frogs, of falling water in the creek, and the soft singing of traditional camp songs. There’s the smell of woodsmoke, and the fading light of the evening turning everything from blue to grey. Of course, there’s also beauty in the people too— the clean red and white uniforms, freshly braided hair, and the shoulder-to-shoulder closeness as the whole camp attends.

There’s also an incredible beauty to the emotions of the moment, to the wonderful feeling of being together like this. Here is a special community of caring friends, of people who know each other deeply, having shared countless experiences and relaxed into mutual habits of kindness toward each other. We feel the bittersweetness of loving Rockbrook, yet knowing that our time together is coming to a close for this summer. There are tears and smiles, laughter and sadness, love and joy —all made more poignant as the evening unfolds.

There’s beauty in what’s said as well. After a camp session, gathering like this evokes heartfelt reflections on what camp has meant to each of us. We can’t help but share how we’ve found unexpected friendship, felt completely at home at camp, how we’re now certain we belong at Rockbrook, and how we ache to return to camp life and our camp friends the rest of the year. Camp has encouraged us, supported us when we weren’t sure, and allowed us to connect so profoundly with each other. Together, we’ve sung songs and forged memories we’ll always treasure. Reflecting back, we’ve found a marvelous spirit in it all.

It’s the Spirit Fire, the century-old tradition at Rockbrook where we gather around a campfire for a program of songs, camper and counselor speeches and a candlelight ceremony to mark the end of each session. Tonight’s Spirit fire was indeed beautiful in all these ways.

As each camper shared their memories and thoughts of the session, and as we sang together favorite traditional Rockbrook songs like “In the Heart of a Wooded Mountain,” there was an extraordinary intimacy to the setting. The beauty of the moment was undeniable, almost unbearably emotional, yet somehow perfectly suited to how we all felt after such an amazing camp session. We all realized that we were part of something special, something deep, enduring and important. When Sarah talked about being grateful, it made perfect sense.

We closed by lighting candles from the Spirit Fire. As small flames were passed from person to person, symbolizing how the spirit of Rockbrook is shared, we felt even more connected, both to each other and to something larger than ourselves. We stood lined up around the lake singing softly, the flickering candlelight reflecting off the water. We felt the abiding magic of this special place, of these very special people. It really was beautiful.

Thank you for a wonderful session. It’s been a pleasure beyond what we imagined, and a joy we’ll cherish. Until next summer, be well and grow in the spirit of Rockbrook.

A few days ago I wrote a piece that described camp as a haven, as a “sanctuary” free from various detrimental forces and challenges common to modern life. I argued that Rockbrook’s goal is to create a special place where kids can escape the pressures of, for example, being too busy, being judged by peers, being inside and online too much, and so on. Creating this haven is our goal because we know that once girls are protected from these various harmful forces, they experience deeply important opportunities to grow in the most joyous ways. Campers develop different instincts and understandings when they find this unique kind of freedom and relief at camp. It’s marvelous to witness.

One comment I received about that post was from a parent who said, “I wish we adults could experience that sort of haven too.” I’d have to agree! It would be nice to be outside more, doing more real-world things, taking a break from screens and having more time to pay attention to everything around us. It would be nice to be free of social pressures, prejudices, competition and criticisms. We know it feels good to be physically active, to be creative, and to connect more with other people from a place of kindness. An environment offering all of this would be amazing for everyone!

I just have to ask, “Why don’t we?” Why don’t we put in some effort creating at least hints of camp life the rest of the year? If we know what camp is doing— establishing a haven from various negative forces —can’t we oppose those forces at home and at school too, and thereby realize some of those same benefits? To some extent, I think the answer is yes.

A few of the ways Rockbrook creates a haven for girls are structural and could be implemented outside of camp. For example, families could be intentional about spending time outside when they can. Parents could make a conscious effort to slow down their family’s schedule, building in “down time” and other opportunities to relax with each other. We could all make an effort to moderate our consumption of news and other forms of media. We could remember to prioritize physical interactions with the world, not exercise or “working out” per say, but rather exercising all our senses among real-world phenomena.

Perhaps the most consequential way Rockbrook is a haven, yet also a way that could be copied at home, is the absence of smartphone use. At camp we all can ditch our phones and happily carry on, but it probably sounds absurd to suggest doing the same at home. After all, ordinarily your phone is your constant companion, always willing to fill your time at the slightest hint of boredom. You might even agree that most of us are on our phones too much, and you too would prefer we instead had more face-to-face communication and other real-world interactions.

Plus, the evidence is staggering how phone use, especially the role played by social media, is doing significant damage to our physical and mental health. Jonathan Haidt’s new book, The Anxious Generation, makes the case for this quite clearly for young people, and Jaron Lanier makes Ten Arguments for Deleting your Social Media Accounts. For both of these authors, there’s unhappiness built right into how we use our phones, plenty of negative consequences, especially for kids.

Of course, putting down our phones is not easy, even if you wanted to. They’re too powerful and too ingrained in our lives, and most importantly, too widespread. If you tried to add restrictions to your teenager’s phone use, the resistance would most likely be epic, the least of which would be her cries, “but all my friends have their phones!” Without some kind of collective or institutional support, the amount of solo effort required to even moderate phone use would likely be too much. By the way, this is one reason Haidt recommends schools be phone-free. Schools have the institutional clout to align opinions on this.

This highlights a powerful advantage camp has— we’re a community. We’re foremost a tight-knit group of people who live (eat, play, make) together, who experience so much together, and who recognize that how we treat each other (with kindness, care, generosity, compassion) makes a crucial difference. At camp, whenever we have to do something that challenges us individually, we can count on encouragement and support from those around us. And if there’s something that would be hard to do on our own, we are more capable when we do it together, whether it be tackling cabin chores, braving uncomfortable weather, or severing the tether we have with a smartphone.

It’s this community spirit that anchors Rockbrook as a haven for girls. Being a community with shared values, but also with regular shared time together, makes most of what we do possible. We focus on the people around us, building amazing positive (friendly) relationships with them all, adding in a few structural elements— tech-free, outdoor experience, playful silliness, a relaxed pace, etc. —and almost like magic we have a beautiful haven.

My hope is that Rockbrook can provide a positive vision of what life can be. I think it does for those lucky enough to experience it. I also believe that if we want to extend the lovely benefits of camp, we need to first find (or build) a sense of community. Camp proves how powerful it is to bring people together like this. Meeting that challenge would be a good place to start.

“In the heart of a wooded mountain,
Circled by silvery streams,
Is a dear old place called Rockbrook,
The scene of our girlhood dreams.

The rosy mist of the morning,
Veil it anew at dawn,
Like a fairyland of beauty,
Where friendships so true are born.”

It’s true that the beauty of camp can be seen in the gorgeous greens of the trees and the sparkle of the cool, crisp lake, but it can also be seen in the true friendships born out of being our authentic selves. At camp, we are encouraged to choose clothes based on how it will allow our bodies to move, shoes designed to support our selected activities, and activities that intrigue us! Our days revolve around activities and out-of-camp trips we have chosen for ourselves, and our friends have done the same. Gone are the facades, societal pressures, and limitations! With each choice, we get closer to figuring out what makes us unique.

And how wonderful it is to see everyone exploring and sharing their interests! As you walk around camp, you will see campers sharing friendship in a myriad of ways. There are often friends on the hill, braiding beads in each other’s hair. Friendship bracelets being made not only in Jewelry Making, but in cabin bunks, on lodge porches, and in Crazy Creeks during down times. Crochet animals made in Curosty and gifted to cabin-mates! And someone is always there to lend a supporting hand or an encouraging cheer! 

These friendships, the ones that have comforted when sad, exalted when celebrated, and supported through uncertainty, are born to last!

“Oh Rockbrook, you have given,
What none can ‘ere destroy,
Ideals to guide our lives by,
And friends to bring us joy.”

—Morgan Boyd
   Camp Mom, former camper and counselor

The anticipation of camp time approaching can create as much joy and excitement as actually arriving! 

Preparing for camp is a time-established ritual that girls at Rockbrook have known for more than a century. Exploring the archives of old Carrier Pigeon newsletters uncovers fascinating references to girls preparing their steamer trunks, counting out their stockings, and visiting department stores for final items. Campers today go through much of the same preparations (though no one arrives by Pullman car anymore!). 

The rituals of reviewing the packing list, counting out clothing items, and labeling belongings can bring up all kinds of feelings for campers and their parents. Sometimes it’s a little nervousness around leaving home for the first time and making new friends. For returning campers, it can be great anticipation to see old friends and return to familiar places. 

Deciding what to bring to camp is another big ritual, approached with great care and attention by some campers. They know that space is limited in their bunk, but there’re so many things they want to bring! Books, a favorite stuffed animal, stationary for writing home, and costumes for cabin skits are crammed in. Careful decisions must be weighed! There’s always an item or two that’s forgotten or left out, but as all campers know, simplifying life down to fewer items brings its own joy too. 

No matter how many or few belongings each camper arrives with, quality time at camp has nothing to do with the “stuff” you bring. Showing up ready to make new friends, try new things, and have great days is the only thing you need to pack. And maybe a toothbrush.

—Miranda Barrett
   Camp Mom, former camper and counselor

It’s not hard to imagine that we’re having a great time at camp. If you’ve been tabbing through the daily photo gallery, and if you watched the recent video, it’s clear. The girls— and I’d add also the staff —are having fun in so many ways. You can tell by the smiles, the laughter, and the excited cheers that erupt throughout the day. You can get a sense of it by seeing the sheer variety of things everyone is doing. In a single day, a camper can ride a horse, shoot an arrow, climb a tower, weave, swim, hike, sing, and many other specific activities. But the campers will also tell you that it’s fun to just be at camp. They value the periods of self-directed free time too, just like the activity time. Mealtime is fun, free swim is fun, and even getting ready for bed and waking up in the morning is fun in way.

How can this be? What’s different about camp that makes even ordinary times fun? I have two thoughts.

The first I mentioned earlier. A big reason life at camp is fun is because of the other people here, the other kids and the staff. You might say that without other friendly people at camp, what we do here wouldn’t measure up at all. We wouldn’t have people wanting to return year after year to shoot another arrow, or put on another costume, or sleep in a rustic cabin. Older campers will put it that way. They’ll tell you they come back to be with their friends. They come back for the people. And I think that’s because no matter what they’re doing, it’ll be great, if they have their camp friends to do it with.

To put that a little differently, it’s the relationships we have with each other that make a difference. The camp culture sets the tone for these by valuing kindness, caring, and respect. The Rockbrook community spirit is built on a philosophy of belonging, encouragement and cooperation —all pointing toward developing deeper more meaningful relationships. At camp, we’re not competing and we’re not judging or undermining anyone. Instead, we’re applauding each other for trying things. We’re supporting everyone around us. There’s a positivity to camp that helps everyone feel safe and valued. This encourages openness and a feeling of freedom to enjoy whatever we’re doing. It all comes from the genuine relationships we have with the kind people around us.

There’s another factor too, another characteristic of camp life that serves up so much fun. It’s Rockbrook’s emphasis on play. On the one hand, our daily schedule provides lots of free, unstructured time for the girls to play. Whether on the hill, or by the creek, or floating in the lake, the campers are playing— being social, being active and creative. They have the freedom for real-world play, for making things up, and open self-expression. Here too, having great friends to join makes it even more likely that kids will spontaneously play together if given the freedom (time, space and encouragement) to do so. It’s wonderful to see these Rockbrook girls relish the opportunities to play at camp.

Rockbrook also promotes play at camp by injecting a little silliness into most things. We know that wearing a goofy hat to dinner makes it more fun. We know that the zanier the dance move, the more fun it will be. When we’re making things, the more imaginative it is the better. We foster exploration and experimentation, excited no matter what the outcome. We’re silly with the rules of the game— tennis with your non-dominant hand, climbing the tower blindfolded, gagaball with more than one ball —all for just the playful fun spirit of it. And when you’re not keeping score or competing (who cares who wins?), the play itself is intrinsically rewarding. This celebration of the silly helps us approach things playfully at Rockbrook.

I should add that the play we enjoy at camp, and the fun we experience while playing, is not just frivolous. There’s mounting evidence that the sort of play that camp provides is a fundamental aspect of childhood that contributes to social, emotional and even cognitive development. Removing the regular opportunity to play is largely detrimental for kids. There’s more to say about that later. For now, let’s appreciate the fun our kids have playing at camp. It’s a really great, and valuable thing.

My friend recently visited Rockbrook with her daughter, a prospective Rockbrook camper. They had a wonderful visit, and I wasn’t surprised when she described Rockbrook as “magical.” If you read the camp blog on a regular basis, you know that the magic of Rockbrook is a recurring theme. Over the past few years, there have been numerous posts on this topic: “A Magical Day at Summer Camp,” “The Magic of Moments,” and “Reliving the Magic,” just to name a few. 

It seems it would be easy to understand the magic of Rockbrook if you’re on the inside. Campers, counselors, staff members, directors, and even the owners get to witness this magic on a daily basis. For those of us on the outside, however, it’s not as easy to wrap our heads around this idea of magic – especially if, like me, you’ve never had the opportunity to experience Rockbrook (or any other summer camp).

As I write this, my daughter is at Rockbrook for her third summer. I think maybe I am starting to understand a little more of what the Rockbrook magic is all about. Over the last couple of years, I have seen hundreds of photos of girls smiling and laughing as they participate in camp activities. As I see photo after photo of girls living out the Rockbrook principle of “be kind, be silly, be brave,” it’s impossible to miss all of the magical moments taking place at camp. 

I pick up on a little bit more of that magic with every letter my daughter sends from camp. In a recent letter, she told us about the “polar plunge,” where at 8:05 AM one day, she would jump into a “freezing cold lake.” It may not sound very fun but when that lake happens to be at Rockbrook and you get to share the experience with your Rockbrook friends, it becomes something magical. The chance to earn a special bead (a fun Rockbrook tradition) only adds to the magic. 

I’ve even been fortunate enough to witness some Rockbrook magic in person. If you ever visit Dolly’s (a Rockbrook favorite) on a summer evening, you may see a large group of campers enjoying ice cream after a trip to Sliding Rock. And if you’re lucky enough, you may be treated to a live performance featuring classic camp songs that have been passed down through generations of Rockbrook campers. As these girls sing at the top of their lungs without a care in the world, you can feel the magic in the air. And while some may disagree, I think it’s more magical than a Taylor Swift concert. 

The magic of Rockbrook goes beyond the heart of a wooded mountain. When I pick my daughter up in a few days, I know she’ll be bringing some of that magic home with her. And maybe she, along with her fellow Rockbrook campers, will spread a little bit of Rockbrook magic into the world – because wouldn’t that be wonderful?

—Jean Lee, proud mother of a Rockbrook camper

One of the phrases I sometimes use to describe the experience of camp is to say it’s “fun that matters.” The idea is that camp is certainly fun, filled with exciting activities, thrilling adventures, and plenty of silliness, but it’s also educational in the best sense of the word. In addition to all the colorful crafts, tennis and tetherball, horseback riding, ziplining, and playing in the lake, for example, the girls at camp are learning and growing in important ways. Camp is not just entertainment, or a brief diversion, like a trip to an amusement park or watching a movie. It means so much more to the children who experience it. To them, camp is profound; it matters, so much in fact, that they yearn to return each summer.

It’s an interesting question to ask, therefore, how camp matters. If it matters because it’s educational, how is it educational and what are these camp kids learning (while they’re having fun)?

There are so many great answers to this question. Over the years I’ve written about camp life fostering core aspects of who we are as human beings, helping children become more creative, more courageous, more compassionate. I’ve said camp helps kids develop critical “life skills,” becoming better decision makers, communicators, collaborative team members. Watch out because camp kids are going to be confident and capable. They’re going to be excellent friends, more joyful than not, and kind to most everyone they meet. Camp teaches all this and more.

We could say, I believe, that girls love camp because it provides all these opportunities for personal growth. In other words, girls love camp not just because it’s fun, but because they’re also learning! Obviously, they wouldn’t put it like that. If you asked, they’d talk about laughing their heads off with their friends rather than the social and emotional skills they’re exercising in that moment. But I think there’s something to this idea. Yes, camp is fun, but Rockbrook girls love camp because the fun here makes a difference in their personal development.

My other theory about why kids love camp, namely that it satisfies critical childhood needs, aligns with this idea. Maybe nowadays children are having difficulty learning these lessons because modern education can’t adequately teach them about the joys of being silly, the role of compromise in a thriving community, or inspire confidence in them to tackle new challenges, to name a few examples common at camp. I wonder if focusing heavily on (academic, athletic, artistic, etc.) achievement limits what most educational systems are really teaching, and if so, our children need more than just school. They have unmet needs, and unfortunately, can feel uneasy as a result. When something can relieve this uneasiness and fulfill these unmet childhood development needs, it’ bound to feel really good. And since camp life does exactly that, since it’s “a place where they feel the most at ease,” kids love it.

This is how the fun of camp matters. It provides a special kind of learning that’s ordinarily hard to find, and that once fulfilled, makes campers feel the “happiest they’ve ever been.”

If this all makes sense, then it tells us how to help girls love their camp experience. Interestingly, you don’t do that by adding more activity options, toys at the lake, or other “amenities” at camp. Of course all of that is an important context for life at camp, for the fun of what we do and where we do it each day. But no, you inspire a love for camp by making whatever we’re doing more meaningful, more thoroughly tied to satisfying those core human development needs. Instead, do what you can to remove their uneasiness. Help girls feel they belong. Prove to them they are stronger than they think. Show them that kindness, caring and generosity form the roots of true friendship. Give them daily chances to collaborate, to create, to be silly and free from judgment. It helps to feed them a freshly baked muffin every morning and the occasional ice cream cone, but you see what I mean.

Everyday we’re having a lot of fun at Rockbrook, but it’s more than that because something more meaningful sticks with the girls. It’s fun that helps them grow and makes them feel really good too. They love this tight-knit community and their place among the friends around them. Camp is a fun experience that really does matter. And it’s my regular joy to be a part of it.

Over the years, as we’ve welcomed new families to Rockbrook, we’ve often found ourselves cautioning first-time parents to avoid particular pitfalls when they are preparing for camp, and later when their child is here. Just like their campers, parents too can experience a mix of nervousness and excitement when contemplating the adventure of camp. These feelings, despite their best intentions, can sometimes lead parents to say or do something that ultimately undermines their child’s success at camp. Knowing about these common pitfalls, and avoiding them, can really make a difference for first-timers— parents and campers alike.

Sarah Carter, Director of Rockbrook, recently published an article addressing these common pitfalls.

Tips for First-time Camp Parents: 10 Traps to Avoid

She presents ten essential tips parents need to know before sending their kids off to summer camp. The article cautions parents but also gives thoughtful advice about how to reassure campers more constructively.

Attending a sleepaway camp like Rockbrook for the first time is exciting! It’s a big step that empowers children, fosters their independence, and grows their confidence. With these tips in mind, parents will make a real difference in the success of their camper’s summer camp journey.